oops

did preety badly for maths 2. sad sia. no hope. doing all i can to lessen the disappointment come results day later. another lesson learnt. If u noe ur alarm clock is faulty, get a new one! There's also another lesson learnt but it's confidential..

got home and for e first time since As started, i told my mama e paper's hard. and she said "got hope?". i said... "slim... 50-50". I really did badly. and she said "see lah, now must repeat one more year". And i told her, jc cannot repeat.. "dunnoe lah... go poly i tink". Den she said... "see lah... waste a few more years". den i say, dunoelah... work at DHL need degree or not? wat future seh!

hmmm..... maybe... my ability to "amazingly do well" for crucial exams ended during promos. It failed to occur for prelims -- i never did any worse than i did for my prelims. And now, ...

overseas uni cost a bomb. maybe shall learn how to make a bomb... den can afford overseas study.

maybe, mama's fault lah. She gave me a hug before i left home for school for the first paper and wished me good luck. Then maths one was ok. the next 2 days she never hug, .... tts why become like tis. maybe...

...hoping...for the best...

ali, i wonder, if ure reading this 10 years from now, would u have made ur first million? would u hold a degree? a degree in wat? would u be happily married with 2 kids? a family to come home to?.....

... or would u be there, blogging.... wondering wat the Ali 10 years from then would be doing... would u be saying to ur girlfren(IF u hv one) ..."I don’t have much money but boy if I did, I’d buy a big house where we both could live" ... would the only thing u can afford to do be only to tell her "she got the sweetest eyes" or write songs .... or simply hope she "don't mind" ... would u simply kp telling others "I know it’s not much but it’s the best I can do" ...

..worse still, dun tell me ure sitting on the roof and kicking off the moss .... i'd like to think it's the roof of ur own house tt ure cleaning, but it's highly unlikely ..... or dun tell me ure still there, unable to distinguish green from blue... in other words, no different from wat u are right now... lousy..

...oh btw ali, at the moment, I dun tink there'll be Ali 10 years from now. I really hope u'd reply soon and say tt ure a somebody... not a nobody... tell me that my guesses were wrong... i need to hear it man.. tell me if i would be cleaning other people's roofs , then at least i shouldnt try trying ... when i noe i'd most likely end up feeling lousy tries after tries... hope to hear from u, ali... i've watched "frequency"... we've watched "frequency"... such weird things could happen...

-ali-

(btw, Frequency is a movie premiering on channel 5 tis saturday at 10. sweet show)