saturday on a sunday

when i'm online, ppl think i'm bloggin. well tt was the case almost everytime last time. always wanting to write and write.

but now, now as in days before my As, i realise tt i duwan to tok too much. dunnoe lah... i kp saying i'm afraid....tt i cant tink of anything to write. not as "creative" as last time. i just dun feel like talking.

always bloggin long entries. but now tt entries are gettin shorter, ppl ask why are they short? 2 reasons. one is tt i dun hv the mood to blog. the second being most tend to not read long entries. the first one is of course the main reason coz u noe me... no matter how much i say i want to blog less, i still end up writing essays most of the time.

latest news is tt my sis wants to go MI. [actually, not tt recent -- just felt liek writing abt it now.] meaning she wants to take the path i'm taking. tis also comes to mean tt if i end up failing my As, my sis would hv one year left to go and i'd only be starting poly? then if my sis go to U, then i would really feel jeslous lah. hmm... having confidence in my sis but not my own. anws,tis are just random tots going on in my mind. All the more i shouldnt fail.

i m staring into space most of the time when i blog now. no inspirations to inspire my writing. no mood to entertain or grab ur attention. not like last time -- blog to make ppl guess and guess until they too scared to guess anymore. blog to simply share wat happened in the day in a fun way.. etc. and if my As are done badly, den maybe no more drive to blog coz then i'd be too ashamed too blog anymore? mama sort of gave me the idea tt ppl who talk alot are usually smart ppl. so if u aint smart, then better talk less? sthg like tis lah..

anws, maybe only... just maybe... dun worry abt me. i'll take care of myself. after 2 weeks, we'll see... if i can still be me. Or will i be some depressed fella hu'll just sit at home and wait for january 7. prelims broke me... cant imagine wat the As would do to me. wateva it is, like i said, all tis talk shall be left to after the exams. now, i should focus and gv my all... 2 weeks... make or break..

a lil bit abt today. all except me and sis wenta visit relatives till night. ate bread in the morning, a mcspicy double in the evening and rice at nite. lucky mama brought home rice coz i was very hungry. still received green packets frm my relatives even though i didnt go. haha...

spending a wee bit too much time staring into space and waiting for the mood to write to come. so i'll go. nites..